Funny One Liners Sms

Why are ghost such bad liars? Because they are easy to see through.

I stole my friend’s wheelchair. Guess who is comes crawling back to me?!
Man so his wife: I’d never say you’re fat! You’re just a bit more visible.

Dark, the side of this toast is. (Yoda at breakfast)

What would you call a person who had no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.

A pig stands in front of an electric socket: “Oh no, who put you into that wall?!

” Dentist: “You need a crown.”
Patient: “Finally someone who understands me”

A cannibal came home late to family dinner. He got the cold shoulder.

Here, I bought you a calendar. Your days are numbered now.

Where do fish sleep?
In the RiverBed.

Talk is cheap, yeah? Have you ever talked to a lawyer?!