Funny Women Quotes - Page 2

Despite my thirty years of research into the woman soul, I have not yet been able to answer the great question that has never been answered: What does a woman want?

– Sigmund Freud

A man gives many question marks, however, a woman is a whole mystery.

– Diana Sturm

Fake hair, fake nails, fake eye lash, artificial face and sometimes fake behavior, yet a woman will say she needs a real man.

Age to women is like Kryptonite to Superman.

God made Adam first because he didn’t want any advice from Eve how to make Adam.

Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

For most of history, Anonymous was a woman

– Virginia Woolf

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

It is very difficult to tell a woman where you’re planning to go..Cos it’s difficult to answer the rest.. WHERE?. WHEN? and FOR WHAT PURPOSE?. And then comes the worst “I WOULD LIKE TO JOIN?”

Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women.

– Nicole Hollander

A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is a man who hopes they are.

– Chauncey Mitchell Depew

Because I’m a guy, I think what you’re wearing is fine. I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is fine. With the belt or without it looks fine. Your hair is fine. You look fine. Can we just go now?

I am the boss in this house my wife told me so.

As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.

– Oscar Wilde

From 30 feet away she looked like a lot of class. From 15 feet away she looked like something made up to be seen from 30 feet away.

– Raymond Chandler

Don’t argue! You cannot win. You cannot beat a woman in a argument. It’s impossible. You will not win. Cause, men, we are handicapped when it comes to arguing cause we have a need to make sense

A man’s face is his autobiography. A woman’s face is her work of fiction.

– Oscar Wilde

A woman should soften but not weaken a man.

– Sigmund Freud

If a woman tells you that she is single by choice, it’s probably because no one has chosen her.

I hate women because they always know where things are.

– James Thurber