We are a work in progress with a lifetime contract.
– Phyllis Koss
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
– David Bissonette
Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and through the nose of the gentleman.
– Herbert
The best way to get husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they are too old to do it.
– Shirley MacLaine
The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman.
– S. T. Coleridge
The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things.
– Jilly Cooper
It’s so great to find that one special person You want to annoy for the rest of your life.
– Rita Rudner
Women and Cats will do as they please. Men and dogs had better get used to it.
– Robert Heinlein
I’m an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
– Zsa Zsa Gabor
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
– Zsa Zsa Gabor
I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back.
– Henny Youngman
Love is blind and marriage is the institution for the blind.
– James Graham
You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.
– Henny Youngman
With the catching end the pleasures of the chase.
– Abraham Lincoln