A friend doesn’t go on a diet because you are fat.
– Erma Bombeck
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- A friend doesn’t go on a diet because you are fat. – Erma Bombeck
- A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween. – Erma Bombeck
- When your mother asks, ‘Do you want a piece of advice?’ it is a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway. – Erma Bombeck
- I’ve been on a constant diet for the last two decades. I’ve lost a total of 789 pounds. By all accounts, I should be hanging from a charm bracelet. – Erma Bombeck
- Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. – Erma Bombeck
- It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows. – Erma Bombeck
- When humor goes, there goes civilization. – Erma Bombeck
- A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween. – Erma Bombeck
- Never accept a drink from a urologist. – Erma Bombeck
- I am not a glutton. I am an explorer of food. – Erma Bombeck