Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.
– Johnny Carson
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- Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. – Johnny Carson
- The post office doesn’t guarantee delivery, but it tries really hard. It’s called best efforts communication. If you put two postcards in the post-box, they don’t necessarily come out then in the same order that you put them in. So, that means that there’s potentially disorder with your delivery, and that’s also true in the
- We’re more effective than birth control pills. – Johnny Carson
- We’re more effective than birth control pills. – Johnny Carson
- He couldn’t ad-lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner. – Johnny Carson
- If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and the impersonators would be dead. – Johnny Carson
- If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead. – Johnny Carson
- If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead. – Johnny Carson
- Happiness is your dentist telling you it won’t hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. – Johnny Carson
- If it weren’t for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we’d still be eating frozen radio dinners. – Johnny Carson