the dark man that forever walks with me….the spectre of emotions that never leaves me


Been walking this path forever now,
but still I don’t get the hang of it.
Is this the way?
The question knocks me hard.

On my shoulders that come to a halt,
I feel the wind heading for tomorrow…
Afflicted as I already am,
obnoxious it becomes…see how lone I am.

Had I known the worth of time,
and savored it with every breath of mine…
It wouldn’t have been me who now cries,
it wouldn’t have been me who so long tries.

A Texas fan, felt the whole loner idea kinda cool,
but now I loathe…wheres the fun in that?
Its a ruin that I walk through,
the forlorn remains of the human emotions that once brew.
Disconsolate doings…
why did I ever abandon the time that was never returning?
Slovenly have I lived my past,
the very contortion that am now regretting.

Delirium, that my mind is in…
warm sun, laughter, innocence, friends, just like old days…
Thud!! Was that for real?
These incoherent flashings and deluded thought…
faces from the past, that my agonized eyes..still sought.

Blaming others for my agitation would only be a felony,
for the mirror knows…
“it is I who is to blame, it is I who lost the game.”

Submitted by Lobsang Namgyal.

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