Kids Jokes
Misbehaving
+60
Little Johnny had finished his summer vacation and gone back to school. Two days later his teacher phoned his mother to tell her that he was misbehaving.
“Wait a minute,” she said. “I had Johnny with me for three months and I never called you once when he misbehaved.”
Submitted by Rajan.
Do You Pray Before Eating?
+51The Sunday School Teacher asks, “Now, Johnny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?”
“No sir,” Little Johnny replies, “I don’t have to, my mom is a good cook!”
Submitted by James.
Little Johnny
+13Johnny, George, and Bert were driving along in their pickup when they saw a sheep caught in the fence with its hind end up in the air.
Bert said, “I wish that was Sharon Stone.”
George echoed, “I wish it was Demi Moore.”
Little Johnny sighed, “I wish it was dark . . . “
Funny Boy And Dad
+80Boy’s father come back from uk & was calling his wife.
Boy:- papa mom has died.
father slaped boy & said why u dont inform me when i was in America
Boy :- i thought i will give u a surprise.
Submitted by suraj.
Mom it’s okay
+26mom:jim! i thought you wash the dishes after you do your homework! why are you watching tv
jim: it’s okay i haven’t done my homework yet
Submitted by jasmeen.
Calming Your Son
+10In the supermarket was a man pushing a cart which contained a screaming, bellowing baby. The gentleman kept repeating softly, “Don’t get excited, Albert; don’t scream, Albert; don’t yell, Albert; keep calm, Albert.”
A woman standing next to him said, “You certainly are to be commended for trying to soothe your son, Albert.”
The man looked at her and said, “Lady, I’m Albert.”
Submitted by Rohit.
A= B =C Calculations
+63Teacher:Students if a=b & b=c ,then we can say that a=c.Give me on more example…
(A boy stands up and says…)
Boy:Mam if i love you and you love your daughter then i love your daughter..!!!!
Submitted by αкαѕн ѕσηι.
Long Hair
+7A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said to him, “I’ll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study your Bible a little, and get your hair cut, then we will talk about it.”
A month later the boy came back and again asked his father if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said, “Son, I’m real proud of you. You have brought your grades up, you’ve studied your Bible diligently, but you didn’t get hair cut!” The young man waited a moment and replied, “You know Dad, I’ve been thinking about that. You know Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair.” His father replied, “Yes son, and they walked everywhere they went!”
Submitted by rajat.
Caught Speeding
+4The cop got out of his car and the kid, who was stopped for speeding, rolled down his window.
“I’ve been waiting for you all day,” the cop said.
The kid replied, “Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.”
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
Submitted by rajat.
The Dumb Kid
+11One day a boy came home running while crying.His mother asked what happened why are you crying?
The boy said`I got punished for something I did not do’.
His mother said ‘That’s horrible.what did you not do’.
The boy in tears said`my homework’
Submitted by kakashi.