It Is Either He Has A New Car Or A New Wife….

DownUp +2

When a man opens a car door for his wife
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It is either he has a new car or a new wife…. :P

Smoking Is Injurious To Health

DownUp +2

A Software Engg was smoking
Girl: Didn’t u see the warning ?
Smoking is injurious to health.
Engineer: We bother only about errors & not warnings.

Which Will Reach Down First?

DownUp +5

A pizza and an apple were thrown down from the 15th floor.
Which will reach down first?
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Ans:The Pizza,as it’s fast food!

I Am Looking For A Bank

DownUp +6

I am Looking for a Bank
which can perform Two things for me.

Give me a Loan,
and
then Leave me Alone……….

Female To Female……

DownUp +5

Only Two Types Of Communications Are Fastest In The World…
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E-Mail To Email
&
Female To Female………

Women Won’t Play Football Not Coz They Aren’t Gud At It….

DownUp +1

“ Women wont play football not coz they aren’t gud at
it..
But coz its against their ego to b dressed up exactly like
10 other women in front of 10,000 people.. ;-)

“No,You Stupid, A Normal Person Would Pull The Drain Plug!

DownUp -2

A Journalist To A Doctor Of A Mental Hospital:

“How Do You Determine Whether To Admit A Patient Or Not?”

Doctor: “Well, We First Fill A Bathtub With Water Till The Top. Then Give A Teaspoon,

A Glass & A Bucket To The Patient & Ask Him / Her To Empty The Bathtub.”

Journalist: “Obviously A Normal Person Would Use A Bucket Because It’s Bigger!”

Doctor: “No You Stupid, A Normal Person Would Pull The Drain Plug!

Admit This Idiot In Ward No. 39

Hey, man! Please Call Me A Taxi

DownUp +12

Man1 : Hey, man! Please call me a taxi.

Man2 : Yes, sir. You are a taxi.

Things In Boys Room

DownUp +44

Things in Boys room Before marriage:

Perfumes

Love letters

Laptops

Cards

Nokia Lumia

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And After marriage:

Pain killers

Loan papers

Unpaid bills

Huggies

Nokia 1100

You Need To Focus More On Your Husband

DownUp +9

Teacher: What is the name of the capital city of Punjab ?

Pappu: Amritsar.

Teacher: Pappu, you are wrong, you need to focus more on your studies.

Pappu: Please madam, can I ask you a few questions.

Teacher: Yes, go ahead.

Pappu: Do you know Jeeto ?

Teacher: No.

Pappu: Do you know Preeto ?

Teacher: No.

Pappu: Do you know Banto?

Teacher: (Angry) Hell no! Who are all these people and why do you ask ?

Pappu: Teacher, you need to Focus more on your husband.

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