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Why did the duck go to jail?

Q: Why did the duck go to jail?
A: Because he got caught selling quack.

How do you get 500 old cows in a barn?

Q: How do you get 500 old cows in a barn?
A: Put up a Bingo sign.

What kind of key opens a banana?

Q: What kind of key opens a banana?
A: A monkey.

A man is fishing and he catches a crocodile

A man is fishing and he catches a crocodile. The crocodile tells him, “Please let me go! I’ll grant you any wish you desire.” The man says, “Okay, I wish my penis could touch the ground.” The crocodile then bites his legs off.

Why is the barn so noisy?

Q: Why is the barn so noisy?
A: Because the cows have horns.

How come oysters never donate to charity?

Q: How come oysters never donate to charity?
A: Because they are shellfish.

Why did the chicken cross the playground?

Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!!

What type of sandals do frogs wear?

Q: What type of sandals do frogs wear?
A: Open-toad!

I asked you to draw a cow and grass

Teacher: “I asked you to draw a cow and grass, but I only see a cow. Where is grass?”
Student: “The cow ate the grass, sir.”

Name a bird with wings but can’t fly

Teacher: “Name a bird with wings but can’t fly.”
Student: “A dead bird, sir.”